Rumor Has It

I cried. I cried so hard I couldn’t breathe. Yes, it was time to say goodbye.

It was a typical day for me. I went to work, had my class, ended the day. A few sticks of cigarette comforted me that day. But there was something different, something awkward that day. Marvin. Yes, Marvin. I saw him quite a few times that day but he never took the time to say Hi, call my attention, invite me to smoke, have lunch or even send me a text message even during class hours. It was weird because he was never like that. So I ended my shift and decided to go home. I packed my things, took my bag, logged out and waited for him. But then I saw this familiar looking guy from afar making his way to the loading/unloading station of the jeepneys. I was sure it was Marvin. We used to go home together because our houses are not that far apart. So I sent him a text message:

“Aba, nangiiwan ka na pala ngayon. Galit kaba talaga sakin?” I sent him a similar text message earlier that day because I already noticed he was giving me a cold shoulder.

“I have my reasons, don’t ever argue” was his reply. I didn’t want to argue, I just wanted to know.

“Di naman ako nakikipag argue, nagtatanong lang naman ako kung galit ka.” I asked him back. I already had a feeling that something weird was going on.

“Kelangan ko munang umiwas sayo. Ang pangit na ng mga feedback.”

I spent the whole night asking, insisting him to tell me what feedback was given. Feedback = Rumor. That was what I had in mind. We exchanged messages for more than an hour without him telling me what I needed to know. His replies were cold, not like the way it used to be. Then, I had no choice but to beg him to tell me.

“Please Marvin, yun lang gusto kong malaman.”

“Ok lang, ako lang naman yung nasaktan. Sabi nila sipsip daw ako sayo. Kaya daw ako lumalapit para lang makapasa sa training and other things worst. Matutulog na ako.”

Then I understood. If you’re someone who doesn’t know the type of person Marvin is, you’d probably say that his reaction was too childish, immature. I didn’t see it like that. Marvin is the type of guy who doesn’t take rumors quite easily. He doesn’t like being talked about. He barely even talks to people apart from me. After reading and replying to his text message, I cried. I cried so hard I couldn’t breathe. Yes, it was time to say goodbye.

Until now, Marvin and I hasn’t spoken to each other. He’s been avoiding me like crazy. I tried reaching out to him, tried asking him why he had to avoid me as if I were the ones who made the rumors. I feel like giving up now. I mean, I’m still hoping to have everything fixed. I don’t feel down and devastated just because I like him so much. It was more of losing the friendship, the rare friendship he barely offers to anyone.

Just the other day, a friend of mine told me something. He was unaware about what was going on between me and Marvin. Then he suddenly asked “Boyfriend mo ba si Marvin? Yun kasi yung kumakalat na issue. Pero ang alam ko di naman talaga kasi sabi mo.”

Then I suddenly understood why he had to stay away from me, why he had to give up our friendship.

To be continued...
 
xoxo
Much Love