"Emowt" Playlist

I've been quite silent for a few days now. I've done a lot of thinking and I just can't get this out of my mind. When I come home from work, I turn on my PC, switch on my iTunes and suddenly choose my "Emowt" playlist where most of the songs playing are the mushy ones.

What I thought was infatuation has now become something serious. I never thought i'd get to a point where I'd just sit and stare blankly up until I get back to reality not really sure what I was thinking about. I only have 2 friends who know about this because I don't want things to be too complicated as it is right now. What I'm saying is, I'm starting to seriously like Seth. I still can't say I'm at a point where I can say I'm falling in love with him, no. Let's just say I'm "seriously attracted" to him. Hopefully there's difference between the two.

After that night happened, I just couldn't get him off my mind. 2 of my friends, Aliah and Lawrence, are the only people who know about what I'm currently going through and they're very supportive about it actually. Most of the time they tell me facts about Seth without me even asking for those. Yes, if you remember in my last entry, Seth has a boyfriend. Aliah told me he met this guy online and they have never met each other yet in person. They have been "together" for months now and Seth is bound to fly to wherever this guy is in September to meet him. He's been telling Aliah he's never breaking up with the guy. Lawrence says otherwise. Seth told him that he's on the verge of breaking up with the guy since the relationship is just "virtual" so he wants to have somebody he can be with physically. He even told Lawrence that he's going to rebook his flight, or maybe even cancel it some time.

I actually don't know who to believe because all I know is that Seth talks to both these guys most of the time about his issues, including, but not limited to, his lovelife. Both of them have told me that I should go for it, that I should start making my move.

I'm at the point where I'm not sure whether to start getting serious and make my presence felt or just wait 'til I confirm that he's over with Mr. LDR. I'm a bit of a flirt but when it comes to something this serious, I know what my limits are. I have to respect the fact that maybe, just maybe, he wants to save their relationship if it is indeed on the verge of falling apart. Or if what Aliah's saying is true, I'd just have to wait... and wait... and wait... 'til he falls in love with me... or 'til I fall out...

xoxo

Much Love